"The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets."

"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."

"Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow I..."

"I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specif..."

"If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you."

"The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time."

"I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am sayi..."

"The road to success is always under construction."