"I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious."

"The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets."

"If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you."

"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."

"Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you..."

"The road to success is always under construction."

"Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?"

"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."