"Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you..."

"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."

"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."

"The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time."

"My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them."

"A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand."

"People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day."

"I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specif..."